Discovering how to navigate the challenging realm of student-teacher dynamics is no easy feat. Ever found yourself in a situation where a student appears to harbor deep-rooted disdain toward you?
Fret not, for you are far from alone in this predicament.
In this blog post, we unravel the secrets to confidently tackle these testing circumstances head-on. Learn how to triumph over student animosity and transform it into an opportunity for growth and understanding. Get ready to conquer the classroom with unwavering confidence!
Who is your favorite?
Let’s admit it. When we were students, we had our favorite teachers. Likewise, we also had teachers whom we hated! This might sound ridiculous, but it’s an important ingredient in a student’s life.
And now that we have become members of the education realm, we should consider the best ways to establish a positive and inspiring learning environment so that even the most reluctant students can show their best work. But, what to do when a student hates you?
Well, you should not allow them to make you miserable!
Entering the classroom, I keep my expectations balanced that not all of these little human beings would love me. Some would hate me. Some would love me. Some would be neutral and indifferent.
And some just secretly do so.
Well, I hate being hated. I know you do too. Hence, you should know what to do when a student hates you.
So, I work things out! For me, it’s a sliver of the full scope. I am empowered. My experiences in the teaching field make me more confident that I can do it!
We can easily perceive how our students feel because we were a student once so we could put ourselves in their shoes. If a student hates you, it means he or she doesn’t like you. Whatever the reason, as a teacher, you should be more responsible to settle things right away.
Know exactly what to do when a student hates you to establish a smooth flow of your instructional delivery.
Well, I just can’t ignore those gazes and eye-rolling. But when I was their age, I could recall, I did it too! I even wondered if those teachers knew how to laugh because they seemed so strict and stern!
Yeah. Felt that.
How to Deal with It?
Disrespectful student attitude. Annoying student behavior. Disruptions.
Wait a minute!
I’ve experienced it. I’ve seen it.
Some students are doing it because they are seeking attention. Or because they are uncomfortable with the subject matter per se.
You’ve got to address the matter sooner so things won’t step up. In other words, you should know what to do when a student hates you. Otherwise, you’ll have unruly and disrespectful students in the classroom. It can be an unpleasant situation in the classroom but don’t get discouraged.
Having a student who seemingly dislikes you is unhealthy. Also, when a student hates you, it can have a negative impact on him or her while at the same time may affect your perceptions.
Therefore, as teachers, we should consider reflecting on what kind of teachers we are to our students. Since we can’t please everybody, at least we have tried our best to give our students equal learning opportunities so they can be at their best.
What to Do When a Student Hates You?
Photo by Caleb Woods on Unsplash
Having a student who hates you is a behavioral situation. And if you happen to be one, well, you’re not alone.
It’s true that as teachers, we can be loved or hated by our students. Maybe they have a bad impression of our physical appearance which includes our facial expressions, mannerisms, and gestures, or of the subject matter itself.
That’s how kids are. Some of them are indifferent. That is why it’s very important to reflect on our ways, especially on our classroom management strategies from time to time.
Grab these best practices so you can have your students respect you and prevent class disruptions because of student misbehavior. There can be a lot of things that go into this, but it’s always good to respond to this situation with calmness and with an open mind.
Respond positively. It’s what to do when a student hates you. But, I wanted to share more specific details about it
So, here we go!
Further, when a student hates you…
1. Start Right!
A student may hate you because of what he or she hears about you that you’re strict or what. It’s really a struggle on our part as teachers to win a good impression on our students. No matter what, always start the year right.
As students stare at you on the first day of classes, they might be thinking of so many things about you. You can feel their excitement, but you can’t deny the presence of reluctance and fear for some. Grab this chance by being nice.
Stand at the door and greet them all with your beautiful smile. Your friendly gestures can change their impression and make sure to be consistent with how you started.
Introduce yourself, and share your story. Use humor, but don’t fake it. Make them realize that all the negative things they heard about you were all wrong. Express your message of acceptance and welcome everyone with your heartwarming thoughts.
“Yes, I can be strict. But, I have a heart. And I always aim for what’s best for you.” I remembered my lines. I admit I was among the teachers with whom students felt intimidated.
Most importantly, on the first day, manage to call your students using their first names. They’ll love it every time they hear their precious names.
2. Build a Sense of Community
It always feels good when your students are receptive to the curriculum because they love to be in your class. One of the best ways to do it is to build good relationships in the classroom.
What to do when a student hates you? Build good relationships. It’s a strong foundation that can create a positive atmosphere in the classroom.
When students feel that they are given importance and that you believe in their capabilities, you’ll be championing their confidence. Make them feel they belong.
In other words, the huge concept of acceptance plays a crucial role in developing good relationships in the classroom. Think of your high school days. How was it? What was it that you didn’t like about your teacher that hindered establishing good relationships?
Was it reading your grades in front of the class? It was good for students who always got the best grades, but it was the other way around for those who didn’t. They could be bullied! It’s painful emotionally.
I think it could be meaningful to congratulate the top of the class and give encouragement to those who barely made it. But not to the extent of reading average grades verbatim in front of the class.
3. Set Clear and Consistent Expectations
Students are more confident if they know what’s expected from them. With regards to this, you should not only focus on setting high and clear academic expectations but also heighten more on behavior expectations.
Then, you should communicate clear and consistent expectations to the students as well as to the parents to avoid heated clashes in the future.
Nicely, put them in writing.
Guided by clear and consistent behavior expectations, students will be more responsible for how they go about learning. Stems up from the rules that you and your students establish, a positive classroom atmosphere develops.
Consequently, your students will become confident and all of them will feel your efforts and concern. Evidently, from my experience, when you closely monitor students’ behavior and progress, students will be guided on how they should treat one another and how they should treat you as their teacher.
I’d say that you should be consistent with your behavior expectations as with your academic aspirations. Undoubtedly, it’s a perfect tandem that brings about effective classroom management schemes where all students are free to participate, ask for clarifications without feeling inadequate, and engage in classroom discussions.
Best of all, you’ll find it easier to correct disruptive behavior because your students are aware of the set rules and expectations in the classroom. Hence, they won’t doubt nor be uneasy with your corrective measures. And they won’t hate you for that.
4. Be Fair to Everyone
Be nice and consistent for everyone. Such as, being polite to your students and avoiding making inappropriate remarks and comments. It pays to be sensitive to how they feel.
Establish the same rules and parallel consequences for everyone in the classroom. It elevates positive school culture and makes everyone feel connected.
To avoid problems in the classroom, you should exercise maximum fairness in the learning space so that students are confident and that you can be trusted. Once they like you, they are always excited to be in your class.
The number 1 rule for being impartial is to be consistent with the ground rules that have been established no matter who is who. Also, you should reflect on how you deal with each student in the classroom, especially since each one of them is unique and has different learning needs.
The whole thing is overwhelming. But, it’s more of a struggle when differences in the classroom become a source of problems. As an example, to avoid instances of being biased, you should have a rubric for every activity and make sure that it’s clearly understood by everyone.
5. Create a Positive Learning Space
Students thrive in a positive and safe learning space. Therefore, if you care for your students and if you are concerned with their academic success, you should establish a positive atmosphere in the classroom.
Great teachers always do that. To illustrate, find time to read our expert roundup article: “20 Phenomenal Educators Share Their Exemplary Teaching Expertise”.
One way of developing a positive learning environment is by incorporating games into your lessons. Engage your students in fun learning activities and you can join them if possible. This will not only make your class exciting but will also enhance good relationships as well.
When students are having fun learning, they are more excited to study and they will love you for that!
6. Talk It Over
Photo by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on
Should you find a student who always misbehaves in class and won’t participate in the learning activities, find time to have a conversation with him or her. Don’t ignore it. Don’t avoid the student. It will alienate him or her.
Be calm and discuss problems and practical solutions. Do your best to disclose the root cause. It enhances your commitment and develops trust sooner.
It’s always fitting to talk with the concerned student before or after class. Be discreet. Don’t announce it before the class.
During your conversation, give the child the chance to present his or her reasons and be a patient listener. Figure out what’s wrong and always extend your best counsel and support.
If things really go contradictory, carefully explain possibilities without demeaning or ridiculing the child. In other words, demonstrate concern by presenting workable solutions that are fair and just.
7. Don’t Take the Matter Personally
Don’t evoke a personal and individual thread. Don’t rush. . Take it out of the equation. When you sense that a student of yours doesn’t like you, you can cultivate a sense of intimate conversations to probe into the deeper thoughts of the child and discover the reasons behind such hatred.
Take a deep breath and don’t tolerate the situation. You’ve got to adopt that post-classroom dialogue.
Whatever it is, don’t take the matter personally. Think of it as one of your greatest struggles as an educator.
With all the talk about creating a sense of belonging in the classroom, you can take advantage of that and use it to win a good impression of your student towards you.
Settle the problem at once and set an agreement.
8. Teach from the Heart
When a student hates you, try teaching from the heart. It can be a student who hates to learn English, Math, or simply the subject you are teaching.
And, in my experience, you can’t just ignore that student.
The very reason I call my students “my children” is that I treat them more than my learners. They form part of my life. Hence, I feel uneasy when a student throws an unwelcoming glance at me. There must be something bothering him or her.
Practically, students can know if your heart is really in the teaching profession. You need to take care of their emotional being which requires reaching out to them.
Furthermore, once you establish connections and relationships with your students they’ll look up to you with respect and high regard. Moreover, if you teach from the heart, you know exactly what students want about learning! They want fun. So you have to make learning fun!
Caring. It’s a perfect ingredient to make students feel comfortable. And if you give it, not a student will hate you. Notably, teaching from the heart elevates the best practice of teaching and caring.
9. Find out why the student feels this way
It can be difficult to deal with a student who seems to hate you. One way to improve the situation is by going straight to the point.
It could be something you said or did, or it could be unrelated to you altogether. Once you know the reason, you can try to address it directly with the student.
If the problem is something you did, apologize and try to make things right. If the problem is not related to you, see if there is anything you can do to help the situation, such as talking to other teachers or administrators about what might be going on.
10. Manage your expectations
You can be very likable to other students but not to some. Remember that not every student will like you, but that doesn’t mean you’re a bad teacher. Just keep doing your best and hopefully, the situation will improve over time.
Every good thing you do for your students will return to you one day. It can be worthwhile. Just establish boundaries, stick to them, and uphold your standards.
In Essence
When a student hates you, never show hate in return. Make an effort and talk to the student nicely. Since you are the captain on board, you are empowered to give your best strategies to keep your students excited about learning.
I’m sure why a student hates you is not something personal. So, you can still do something about it. Don’t get discouraged. Love and hate in the classroom are normal because you are dealing with individual differences.
Just don’t give up on your students. On the whole, they need you. You ought to help them to become better. Just make them love you. I believe in your capacity.
What to do when a student hates you? Things have been given to take care of things that are going on. However, I still consider how you deal with it. Share your thoughts below.
